Sunday, August 22, 2010
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Ski Beatz & Mos Def: Taxi
Watching the creative process from behind the scences is cool
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SQ88tdNq5vM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SQ88tdNq5vM
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Letters from Romantic Nubian (Guest Blogger)
This was orignally sent out by TC@Urbanflavorz in 2006.
What's up UF family!! I would just like to thank everyone for
opening their hearts and sending me all those confessions. Now that I
see everyone else has issues, I don't feel as messed up in the
head as I did before. Now to the story I have to tell. A few
Saturdays ago, I went out to see one of my homies perform(Princess of
Controversy, check her out, she's nice!!) at one of those poetry reading
spots on 14th and U street. I had my little email printed out and
everything, I was ready to hear a good show…until I went to the front
door. First of all, my email was a week late, and second of all, it was
open mic night. I looked at my watch, and I had an hour before I could
hit another spot, so I went in and checked the joint out. As soon as I
walked through the door, I caught eyes with this beautiful brown skinned
woman, with a killer smile. After I
stared at her for a second, I realized that I knew her; so I went
over to speak to her. I spoke to her, and we chatted for about 5
minutes until suddenly, she looked across the room with a "what in the
hell??" face. I turned to see what she was looking at, only to see a
tall dark skinned man with locs standing on top of a chair,
pointing to her. I looked at dude, then looked at her and asked, "Is
that your man or something, I'm not trying to get you in trouble or
nothing.." I know how jealous dudes are, I wasn't trying to get
jumped by a bunch of poets in that joint…niggas be reciting Parables
of Battle while they stomp me out with no shoes on…but anyhoo… As I
turned around to take a look at this dude again, he was gone. I
turned around to ask her where he went and he was RIGHT BESIDE HER. In
10 seconds flat, I heard this dude ask the lady was she there
with me, what size wedding ring she wore, did she need a foot
massage, what was her mothers maiden name, did she know how
to do the Tootsie Roll, and about 5 other questions that I couldn't hear
because I was laughing too hard. I thought it was a big joke, but he
was dead serious. She shot him down in a rather harsh
manner, told me goodbye, and stormed out the door. After about
almost a minute of silence, I asked dude, " Aye Slim, where's the
bar." He showed me, and the humor started from there. The brother
called himself Romantic Nubian. He was a "righteous" brother from
Africa who said his mission in life was to "spread love the
old fashioned way." To make a long story short, me and dude rapped at
the bar and got twisted. After about our 6th or 7th shot, he
started rolling up to females and just singing to them. Most of the
time, he was off key and didn't know the right words to the song…
straight Eddie Kane Style. We had the bartender laughing so hard, that
she stated inviting people to come and speak to us. I then
signed up for a shot on the mic, and brought him onstage. We took
questions from the crowd, and had our own little "Dr. Phil" type of show
going on. I'll leave you all with the Question and Answer
session from the "Dear Romantic Nubian" show:
Dear Romantic Nubian,
I need your help. Since you have the word "romantic" in your name,
maybe you can help me out. My girl tells me that I am not romantic
enough for her. I am scared that if the romance is missing in our
relationship, then she will go look for it elsewhere. Help me out
brotha!!!
Have no fear black man, I know ROMANCE!!
May I suggest cooking for your soul mate? How about a "vegan"
surprise to ensure good health? A warm platter complete
with "squash" or fried "okra" makes any candlelight dinner
complete. How about sketching a portrait of her while reciting a
couple of passages of poetry? Here are some key words that might be
helpful "Stars", "Moon", "Cipher", "Spirit", "Soul" make sure you
say each verse with "angst" to fully convey the potency of your
love. When the above is done, pop in a Julia Roberts flick then can get
ready for some "power aggressive cuddling". No sex, just> aggressive cuddling and holding. You can also compliment
this night with songs by Craig David or Bobby McFerrin.
Hey Romantic Nubian,
My girlfriend and I broke up and she will not let it go. She
follows me to every lesbian bar/club that I go to, and I'm really
starting to fear for my life. What to do?
If someone is still madly in love with you once you have showed
disinterest, it can be very difficult. There are instances where you
have to be cruel to be kind to save the person from their self. This
can be painful, but the best are able to keep their pride. I have often
been that person still madly in love, I know even me. Here
are some helpful things that I have heard that made me "wake up `:
"Nigga f*ck you and you poems"
" Aren't the Knicks or SOMEBODY playing basketball......MAN DAMN!
..........SHEESH"!!!
"Aye dog, she sleep right now, if I see this number again I'm going to
slap the shit out of you".
"CUDDLE??? My brother GET REAL!!"
These things words help me realize there was no longer hope, but
only in this lifetime.
Dear Romantic Nubian,
I am a white guy who is in love with black women. I love everything
about them, the way they walk, talk, dress...everything about them turns
me ON! But I'm not a cool "Eminem" white guy...I'm basically a nerd.
What can I do?
Hello Kind Brother devoid of melanin,
Hope everything is grand in your world, and the stars and the moon are
aligning on this joyous day of peace. You seem to be enamored in this
young urban lifestyle is this what draws you to these women? Women want
to feel special, negro women in particular. The fact you have this
sudden interest in Nubian sisters queen of the earth,
raises a red flag.
How would you like it if she was looking for a cool 'Bubba Sparks' kinda
guy instead of an 'Eminem" type. Feel that sting? That's how she would
feel. Search for her spirit and cultivate her
individuality. See if it is in fact "she" that you search for
or 'you' that she seeks. May I suggest holding hands and skipping near
the reflecting pools near our lovely Washington Monuments.
Concoct a small picnic and crack open a cantaloupe or even better in you
case a watermelon( to show that you are indeed sensitive to her needs).
This way nurture a rapport with her and fertilize your one on one
relationship.
Hey romantic,
TC told me you were African. Are you African? If so I have a
question for you: why are African men so aggressive in the club?
All that grabbing and pulling on females, is that what's hot in the
streets of Africa?
Please don't paint us with that large brush. A lot of us that come from
Africa are among the privileged back home, some even royalty or near.
Also, Women are more submissive in general. This ego and
alcohol makes for a bad mix sometimes in a club. That being said
you must blame the actions on the individual. To answer your
question individually, I would rather write a poem or buy her a rose
from the gentleman of Latin decent who peruses the club. Instead of
grabbing or pulling I would just pull up to her bust out an
impromptu song by Ray J or Nick Cannon as a testament of my
affection. That should at least get you in the door. My brother
Solomon from the Sudan got slapped up by security for doing that.
The people mocked him and through Hypnotic on him, but he won the
young lady's heart. She even gave him her AOL instant messenger
info so he would be able to contact her. So the moral to the story is,
passive gestures of the heart shall defeat grabbing in groping, just ask
my brother Solomon.
What's up UF family!! I would just like to thank everyone for
opening their hearts and sending me all those confessions. Now that I
see everyone else has issues, I don't feel as messed up in the
head as I did before. Now to the story I have to tell. A few
Saturdays ago, I went out to see one of my homies perform(Princess of
Controversy, check her out, she's nice!!) at one of those poetry reading
spots on 14th and U street. I had my little email printed out and
everything, I was ready to hear a good show…until I went to the front
door. First of all, my email was a week late, and second of all, it was
open mic night. I looked at my watch, and I had an hour before I could
hit another spot, so I went in and checked the joint out. As soon as I
walked through the door, I caught eyes with this beautiful brown skinned
woman, with a killer smile. After I
stared at her for a second, I realized that I knew her; so I went
over to speak to her. I spoke to her, and we chatted for about 5
minutes until suddenly, she looked across the room with a "what in the
hell??" face. I turned to see what she was looking at, only to see a
tall dark skinned man with locs standing on top of a chair,
pointing to her. I looked at dude, then looked at her and asked, "Is
that your man or something, I'm not trying to get you in trouble or
nothing.." I know how jealous dudes are, I wasn't trying to get
jumped by a bunch of poets in that joint…niggas be reciting Parables
of Battle while they stomp me out with no shoes on…but anyhoo… As I
turned around to take a look at this dude again, he was gone. I
turned around to ask her where he went and he was RIGHT BESIDE HER. In
10 seconds flat, I heard this dude ask the lady was she there
with me, what size wedding ring she wore, did she need a foot
massage, what was her mothers maiden name, did she know how
to do the Tootsie Roll, and about 5 other questions that I couldn't hear
because I was laughing too hard. I thought it was a big joke, but he
was dead serious. She shot him down in a rather harsh
manner, told me goodbye, and stormed out the door. After about
almost a minute of silence, I asked dude, " Aye Slim, where's the
bar." He showed me, and the humor started from there. The brother
called himself Romantic Nubian. He was a "righteous" brother from
Africa who said his mission in life was to "spread love the
old fashioned way." To make a long story short, me and dude rapped at
the bar and got twisted. After about our 6th or 7th shot, he
started rolling up to females and just singing to them. Most of the
time, he was off key and didn't know the right words to the song…
straight Eddie Kane Style. We had the bartender laughing so hard, that
she stated inviting people to come and speak to us. I then
signed up for a shot on the mic, and brought him onstage. We took
questions from the crowd, and had our own little "Dr. Phil" type of show
going on. I'll leave you all with the Question and Answer
session from the "Dear Romantic Nubian" show:
Dear Romantic Nubian,
I need your help. Since you have the word "romantic" in your name,
maybe you can help me out. My girl tells me that I am not romantic
enough for her. I am scared that if the romance is missing in our
relationship, then she will go look for it elsewhere. Help me out
brotha!!!
Have no fear black man, I know ROMANCE!!
May I suggest cooking for your soul mate? How about a "vegan"
surprise to ensure good health? A warm platter complete
with "squash" or fried "okra" makes any candlelight dinner
complete. How about sketching a portrait of her while reciting a
couple of passages of poetry? Here are some key words that might be
helpful "Stars", "Moon", "Cipher", "Spirit", "Soul" make sure you
say each verse with "angst" to fully convey the potency of your
love. When the above is done, pop in a Julia Roberts flick then can get
ready for some "power aggressive cuddling". No sex, just> aggressive cuddling and holding. You can also compliment
this night with songs by Craig David or Bobby McFerrin.
Hey Romantic Nubian,
My girlfriend and I broke up and she will not let it go. She
follows me to every lesbian bar/club that I go to, and I'm really
starting to fear for my life. What to do?
If someone is still madly in love with you once you have showed
disinterest, it can be very difficult. There are instances where you
have to be cruel to be kind to save the person from their self. This
can be painful, but the best are able to keep their pride. I have often
been that person still madly in love, I know even me. Here
are some helpful things that I have heard that made me "wake up `:
"Nigga f*ck you and you poems"
" Aren't the Knicks or SOMEBODY playing basketball......MAN DAMN!
..........SHEESH"!!!
"Aye dog, she sleep right now, if I see this number again I'm going to
slap the shit out of you".
"CUDDLE??? My brother GET REAL!!"
These things words help me realize there was no longer hope, but
only in this lifetime.
Dear Romantic Nubian,
I am a white guy who is in love with black women. I love everything
about them, the way they walk, talk, dress...everything about them turns
me ON! But I'm not a cool "Eminem" white guy...I'm basically a nerd.
What can I do?
Hello Kind Brother devoid of melanin,
Hope everything is grand in your world, and the stars and the moon are
aligning on this joyous day of peace. You seem to be enamored in this
young urban lifestyle is this what draws you to these women? Women want
to feel special, negro women in particular. The fact you have this
sudden interest in Nubian sisters queen of the earth,
raises a red flag.
How would you like it if she was looking for a cool 'Bubba Sparks' kinda
guy instead of an 'Eminem" type. Feel that sting? That's how she would
feel. Search for her spirit and cultivate her
individuality. See if it is in fact "she" that you search for
or 'you' that she seeks. May I suggest holding hands and skipping near
the reflecting pools near our lovely Washington Monuments.
Concoct a small picnic and crack open a cantaloupe or even better in you
case a watermelon( to show that you are indeed sensitive to her needs).
This way nurture a rapport with her and fertilize your one on one
relationship.
Hey romantic,
TC told me you were African. Are you African? If so I have a
question for you: why are African men so aggressive in the club?
All that grabbing and pulling on females, is that what's hot in the
streets of Africa?
Please don't paint us with that large brush. A lot of us that come from
Africa are among the privileged back home, some even royalty or near.
Also, Women are more submissive in general. This ego and
alcohol makes for a bad mix sometimes in a club. That being said
you must blame the actions on the individual. To answer your
question individually, I would rather write a poem or buy her a rose
from the gentleman of Latin decent who peruses the club. Instead of
grabbing or pulling I would just pull up to her bust out an
impromptu song by Ray J or Nick Cannon as a testament of my
affection. That should at least get you in the door. My brother
Solomon from the Sudan got slapped up by security for doing that.
The people mocked him and through Hypnotic on him, but he won the
young lady's heart. She even gave him her AOL instant messenger
info so he would be able to contact her. So the moral to the story is,
passive gestures of the heart shall defeat grabbing in groping, just ask
my brother Solomon.
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Did Robert get beat by a Girl, joe?
My man got beat down by a girl on the bus when we were in junior high.He felt the chic on the butt. She in his face ready to fight. He not sweating it trying to difuse and apologize.The bus driver slammed on brakes trying to get them to stop.This caused a young Robert Umah to fall and ole girl ji stomped him out. Knotted that bamma up TURRIBLE.
The dude Robert was african.I remember his father came to my house afterwards to see if it was true that it was a GIRL that did this. Bamma had the heavy nigerian accent talking about "Is it true RRRobert gat beat bi dee GIRL? a GIRL did this to Robert? No! a GANG did this to ROBERT!!!
Robert was like one of my best dudes, so I tried to tell his dad that Robert would have won if the bus didnt slam on the brakes. That nigga father just turned his back and rolled while I was still talking. No "bye" no "alright", nothing.He was pissed that his son got PUNISHED by a 13 yr old girl. The next year they moved to Connecticut.
His father looked just like dude
I looked that bamma on FB, nigga Robert aint even accept me joe.
This story was inspired by this
http://worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshh5O9A9zjj2F2id572
The dude Robert was african.I remember his father came to my house afterwards to see if it was true that it was a GIRL that did this. Bamma had the heavy nigerian accent talking about "Is it true RRRobert gat beat bi dee GIRL? a GIRL did this to Robert? No! a GANG did this to ROBERT!!!
Robert was like one of my best dudes, so I tried to tell his dad that Robert would have won if the bus didnt slam on the brakes. That nigga father just turned his back and rolled while I was still talking. No "bye" no "alright", nothing.He was pissed that his son got PUNISHED by a 13 yr old girl. The next year they moved to Connecticut.
His father looked just like dude
I looked that bamma on FB, nigga Robert aint even accept me joe.
This story was inspired by this
http://worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshh5O9A9zjj2F2id572
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
I had California Tortilla for lunch yesterday and I'm still going thru changes
I’m eating at the California Tortilla yesterday. Im dining in the seats facing the street, so I’m visible from the street. The food is hitting the spot too. I’m ji pleasantly engrossed in this burrito (the blackened chicken was a nice touch). Then I hear a banging on the door, like that police at your door type knock. That shit momentarily scared me to death. I prolly jumped a bit, b/c I was in my zone. So I’m turning around expecting to see somebody I know laughing b/c they “got” me. I turn around and see this Florida Evans stunt double who doesn’t look familiar. She is not laughing. She is looking at me like “Oh ....You don’t know me nigga, Really?” So I don’t want to overreact. I’m thinking maybe this is somebody I used to work with or from my aunts church. I give that look like “May I help you?” from inside the window. I’m trying to mask the fact that I’m slightly annoyed, b/c obviously this lady appears to know me. Um…..WTF do u want? A nigga trying to enjoy a burrito and this bitch banging on the door in public making a small scene and she look a hot fool mess. So she points to her stomach and rubs her belly like “Handle this, Nigga!” I seriously don’t know if this chick is pregnant or just hungry. Either way she looking at me like it is MY job and MY job only to fix it. This chick puts her hand out and the other one on her hip doing the international sign for gimme some money. Not only is she begging but I guess she feel like a nigga had nerve to be eating in the window like that when she is out here preggo and/or hungry. So I give her a look like “Nawl, joe!” Then she is on to the next one. Rinse and repeat with other random people in the vicinity. Then she starts pulling the whole bathroom attendant move. You know, opening the door for people at a fast food joint and getting pissed when they don’t tip. Its messed up if she was preggo and out here using strong arm panhandling tactics. I would have gave her some money under different circumstances. She was really acting like I was dodging child support and she caught me eating in the window. Like EYE had nerve. I never seen that chick in my life.
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Monday, May 3, 2010
Some ole Pyramid/Ponzi Scheme/MLM/Network Marketing Stuff? Why folks do it???
I think folks think it is a way of obtaining wealth that they aren't privy to. That is true in many cases but the answer is not necessarily MLM/Network marketing on the bottom floor level.
Its like any other form of pimping. You use different cliches and truisms to cloud that hoe's brain to go get you your money.
These invites remind me of the mobb when u get whacked. It always comes from a good friend when u least expect it.
Perfect example.......
Dude:
how much money did you make at home this week? If you would be interested in making money with my new company let me.
3:49pmME
what kind of work u got?
3:54pm Dude
man I am starting a new company. Looking for some dudes that is trying to make some money. I am in the progress of setting up something for tonight at 9pm to show everyone
Its like any other form of pimping. You use different cliches and truisms to cloud that hoe's brain to go get you your money.
These invites remind me of the mobb when u get whacked. It always comes from a good friend when u least expect it.
Perfect example.......
Dude:
how much money did you make at home this week? If you would be interested in making money with my new company let me.
3:49pmME
what kind of work u got?
3:54pm Dude
man I am starting a new company. Looking for some dudes that is trying to make some money. I am in the progress of setting up something for tonight at 9pm to show everyone
Monday, March 22, 2010
Coonskin
Post Aaron McCruder's "Boondocks" and Spike Lee's "Bamboozled", "Coonskin" (1975) is film ahead of its time. Directed by Ralph Bakshi, starring cast voices:Barry White,Charles Gordone, Scatman Crothers, Philip Michael Thomas Although this film proceeded Boondocks and Bamboozled the story is ironically relevant for today. I can only suggest everyone watch with an open mind with the desire to comprehend. The introduction song playing during the opening credits may even be a challenge for some. I actually enjoyed it. Hope you enjoy watching this film.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9S5C8Je7nAg&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9S5C8Je7nAg&feature=related
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
My Mexican Standoff with some Turkey Buzzards.
I get home Sunday and find out that the compressor in my Refrigerator just crapped out. So I had to get all the food out of there before shit start smelling super putrid throughout the whole house. I had a almost a whole chicken in the fridge that I had from the night before. The chicken had been punished but it was still some good yard bird left. Anyway when I trashed the chicken along with some other stuff the trash started leaking. Even know the trash man didn’t come till 2 days later I had to get that shit up out my house. I wasn’t going to be winning any awards on household freshness and aromas, shit was getting ji funky up in that joint.
The next morning I get up and see all this familiar shit all in the middle of the street. It’s my trash! AND it’s a mob of Turkey Vultures around my yard. I mean it is like at least 10 of them. Turkey Vultures are buzzards and are the size of large turkeys and they feed off road kill .I live near the woods so u only see them if a deer or a cat/dog has lost its life on these mean Upper Marlboro streets. I guess since the snow, food has been scarce b/c I had been seeing them fly around the neighborhood. These joints are ji big like hawks. I’m mad, for one I got to clean all this shit and for 2 it could be some personal shit in that trash. I don’t want the neighbors all in my trash. That’s personal. At this point I’m not even thinking about the stand off.
I had to run to Comcast so I’m thinking I’ll deal with that on my way out. I hopped in my truck and figure I would just drive near the them and they will fly away and I can clean this up a bit. I get in the car and beep the horn and these bammas are just casually stepping off not even a lil jog , but they respect this truck. They are doing like dudes do on the block when the police comes, a lil casual walk in the other direction. In the truck, you could truly appreciate the size of these joints. This was not a flock of doves these bammas look damn near 3 ft. I was thinking about taking one out off the vehicular homicide. Ya know, just to let them know I meant business, but nobody wants a dead vulture in the middle their street.
So I get out of the car thinking maybe a Human can scare them off b/c they was not trippin off me being in the truck. I had my shovel with me. If one of them wanted to bust a move ? I was gonna let freedom ring all across this land. So I get out off the car with my shovel and a few flew off but I still got a couple hard heads tryin to be tough.I said “ SKWAW!! SKWAW! Get from round here! This my House! I pay bills round this joint!” Nothing. I look around and finally I see why these jokers are not rolling. I m separating them from the chicken I put in the trash. So I guess they were having the feast of all feasts and I am interrupting them from a once in a lifetime meal. So I’m outside of my car with the shovel and about 5 vultures looking slam at me just a few feet away. I have been making noises embarrassing myself, people are looking out the window and they still don’t budge. These bammas CAN fly so I was kind of weary of an aerial attack .I fugg around and fall in the snow and these bammas would be punishing me to my death.Aint nobody trying to die or be in the hospital from no freak Turkey Vulture accident. Anway, we in the middle of the stand off and one of them comes at me. This bamma says the hell with me and goes str8 for the chicken. His boys follow him and now they are fighting in front of me for the chicken with a whole lot of movement and feathers ruffling and shit, so I just step to the side. The head dude flies off with the stash and they follow and some of the bottom feeders post up on some of my neighbors rooftops. Now, Im dolo with these jokers looking at me from the roof. All could do was just clean that mess up and put the my trash back in the house. I didn’t win that battle.
The next morning I get up and see all this familiar shit all in the middle of the street. It’s my trash! AND it’s a mob of Turkey Vultures around my yard. I mean it is like at least 10 of them. Turkey Vultures are buzzards and are the size of large turkeys and they feed off road kill .I live near the woods so u only see them if a deer or a cat/dog has lost its life on these mean Upper Marlboro streets. I guess since the snow, food has been scarce b/c I had been seeing them fly around the neighborhood. These joints are ji big like hawks. I’m mad, for one I got to clean all this shit and for 2 it could be some personal shit in that trash. I don’t want the neighbors all in my trash. That’s personal. At this point I’m not even thinking about the stand off.
I had to run to Comcast so I’m thinking I’ll deal with that on my way out. I hopped in my truck and figure I would just drive near the them and they will fly away and I can clean this up a bit. I get in the car and beep the horn and these bammas are just casually stepping off not even a lil jog , but they respect this truck. They are doing like dudes do on the block when the police comes, a lil casual walk in the other direction. In the truck, you could truly appreciate the size of these joints. This was not a flock of doves these bammas look damn near 3 ft. I was thinking about taking one out off the vehicular homicide. Ya know, just to let them know I meant business, but nobody wants a dead vulture in the middle their street.
So I get out of the car thinking maybe a Human can scare them off b/c they was not trippin off me being in the truck. I had my shovel with me. If one of them wanted to bust a move ? I was gonna let freedom ring all across this land. So I get out off the car with my shovel and a few flew off but I still got a couple hard heads tryin to be tough.I said “ SKWAW!! SKWAW! Get from round here! This my House! I pay bills round this joint!” Nothing. I look around and finally I see why these jokers are not rolling. I m separating them from the chicken I put in the trash. So I guess they were having the feast of all feasts and I am interrupting them from a once in a lifetime meal. So I’m outside of my car with the shovel and about 5 vultures looking slam at me just a few feet away. I have been making noises embarrassing myself, people are looking out the window and they still don’t budge. These bammas CAN fly so I was kind of weary of an aerial attack .I fugg around and fall in the snow and these bammas would be punishing me to my death.Aint nobody trying to die or be in the hospital from no freak Turkey Vulture accident. Anway, we in the middle of the stand off and one of them comes at me. This bamma says the hell with me and goes str8 for the chicken. His boys follow him and now they are fighting in front of me for the chicken with a whole lot of movement and feathers ruffling and shit, so I just step to the side. The head dude flies off with the stash and they follow and some of the bottom feeders post up on some of my neighbors rooftops. Now, Im dolo with these jokers looking at me from the roof. All could do was just clean that mess up and put the my trash back in the house. I didn’t win that battle.
Friday, January 8, 2010
Helmet Mike
We had a dude a around our way named Helmet Mike. He was like my man Kenny's younger brother or something. They had a lot of cousins living in their house so I dont know what the relation was. My man Kenny was way younger than us so the kid Helmet Mike was like man 7 or 8 at this time.
It was a taboo subject b/c Kenny was real cool, a good dude.Like a type where its ji wrong to really to do anything more than light jokes with him.Nobody really went IN on Kenny even though it was a wealth of material. He was a fat boy with a retard brother.
Bamma's used to make off collar remarks under their breath about Helmet Mike while Kenny was around but when he wasnt listening. THAT shit used to be funny as SHIT, but u didnt want slim to see u laughing so u would try to hide it.That would make the shit seem even more funnier.That would be an inside joke when dude was around for months.
We used to play football in front of Kenny's house.While we would play Helmet Mike used to watch out of the window on the top floor. I think they used leave dude unattended.I guess dude used to want to get out and play with us. One day slim just bust out of the window and fell out a 2 story window and fell slam into the bushes helmet and all.Dude got up as if he just slipped on the curb and ran str8 for us saying "BAAAAWL! BAAWL!" We just gave him the ball, joe. I know this cant be true but it seemed like a team of doctors and nurses came running after him. I know it was a least one hired professional tho.His famliy was hysterical.It must have been a Big Momma Sunday dinner b/c a RACK ppl came running out that house.That shit was wild.U trying to convert a 3rd down and all of a sudden a nigga with a helmet just fall out of window.Weird
It was a taboo subject b/c Kenny was real cool, a good dude.Like a type where its ji wrong to really to do anything more than light jokes with him.Nobody really went IN on Kenny even though it was a wealth of material. He was a fat boy with a retard brother.
Bamma's used to make off collar remarks under their breath about Helmet Mike while Kenny was around but when he wasnt listening. THAT shit used to be funny as SHIT, but u didnt want slim to see u laughing so u would try to hide it.That would make the shit seem even more funnier.That would be an inside joke when dude was around for months.
We used to play football in front of Kenny's house.While we would play Helmet Mike used to watch out of the window on the top floor. I think they used leave dude unattended.I guess dude used to want to get out and play with us. One day slim just bust out of the window and fell out a 2 story window and fell slam into the bushes helmet and all.Dude got up as if he just slipped on the curb and ran str8 for us saying "BAAAAWL! BAAWL!" We just gave him the ball, joe. I know this cant be true but it seemed like a team of doctors and nurses came running after him. I know it was a least one hired professional tho.His famliy was hysterical.It must have been a Big Momma Sunday dinner b/c a RACK ppl came running out that house.That shit was wild.U trying to convert a 3rd down and all of a sudden a nigga with a helmet just fall out of window.Weird
Thursday, January 7, 2010
The Special Needs Dude
In junior high they had a special group that used to go to the same school as us. They were like the United Nations of Handicap folk. U had ur down down syndrome folk, the jokers that age early, Hellen Keller types, even Missing Link aborigine jokers. Just a str8 misfits of science type of cast.I mean it was real bad.
The thing about it is, them bammas had to be older than us too. The intellectual capacity was NOT there.No one is going to argue that at all,but nobody would pick on them. They had some with enuff size to tear some shit up.A few of the males would always be strong on some minature Mike Tyson shit. Niggas respect crazy, you couple that with super human mutant strength? U got a clean retard ride thru school, aint nobody jonin on u.
They used to keep them segregated from us from the most part. We would see them when we switched classes.They used to use the bathroom at different times than us to.
One day I get out of class with a hall pass/bathroom pass or something. I go into the bathroom.I see a bamma peeing at the stall with his pants ALL the way down like he is 3 yrs old or something. So I'm thinkin WTF? This bamma butt all out WTF?!!? I didnt realize it was one of the Special Needs Jokers at this point.Im thinking it was a peer, another normal 12/13 yr old. So i said something to equivalent of "DUDE WTF?" but whatever 12/13 would say at that time. Mooning ppl was like the big joke in our school too. So some body could have set me up. When I said something Special Needs dude turned around with his hand on his dick, this bamma was beating off.That bamma was screamed like "AYYYYYYYYAYAYAY" his eyes looked empty and distant that bamma looked like a Monster. I screamed too" AYYYYYAYAYAYA". It was like on E.T. when Elliot first saw him we both were scared I HAULED ass to my class and put my head down
The thing about it is, them bammas had to be older than us too. The intellectual capacity was NOT there.No one is going to argue that at all,but nobody would pick on them. They had some with enuff size to tear some shit up.A few of the males would always be strong on some minature Mike Tyson shit. Niggas respect crazy, you couple that with super human mutant strength? U got a clean retard ride thru school, aint nobody jonin on u.
They used to keep them segregated from us from the most part. We would see them when we switched classes.They used to use the bathroom at different times than us to.
One day I get out of class with a hall pass/bathroom pass or something. I go into the bathroom.I see a bamma peeing at the stall with his pants ALL the way down like he is 3 yrs old or something. So I'm thinkin WTF? This bamma butt all out WTF?!!? I didnt realize it was one of the Special Needs Jokers at this point.Im thinking it was a peer, another normal 12/13 yr old. So i said something to equivalent of "DUDE WTF?" but whatever 12/13 would say at that time. Mooning ppl was like the big joke in our school too. So some body could have set me up. When I said something Special Needs dude turned around with his hand on his dick, this bamma was beating off.That bamma was screamed like "AYYYYYYYYAYAYAY" his eyes looked empty and distant that bamma looked like a Monster. I screamed too" AYYYYYAYAYAYA". It was like on E.T. when Elliot first saw him we both were scared I HAULED ass to my class and put my head down
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Celebrate it cuz you made it!
Celebrate it cuz ya made it! Another year in the books! We made it. Don't forget those that didn't!
Good Morning 2010! Make it count y'all
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